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New Years Resolutions

Stay tuned for an update on my New Years Resolutions.

I never write my resolutions in the month of January because I want to see what the month looks like. I want to see how I've started the year off and go from there. Different but makes the most sense.

Here are some examples :

Last January - my goal was to go to the gym at least 3 times a week.

NEVER HAPPENED. For more than one reason but mostly because I was making excuses.


So let's see how this goes!

What are your resolutions/goals?

Who's Got the Funk?

Motherhood is rough! 

There are some days where it seem like a piece of cake. Little one is sound asleep and I can finally run and shower. Other days I'm wondering if I was even made out to be a mom. Sometimes it feels so right, others I'm at a loss for how unprepared and unnatural I am.

Post Partum Depression and Anxiety is R E A L. 

I prepared myself pre-birth, all throughout the pregnancy, to recognize signs, to get coping mechanisms and, essentially, what it was and what it wasn't.

I was convinced I wouldn't have Post-Partum Depression. I was under the impression you had a choice.. I was wrong.

How I knew?

I was denying it. I was telling myself I couldn't and didn't realize just how much I was missing. I missed the fact that breastfeeding was affecting me more than I thought. I missed the fact that I got so easily frustrated with the lack of latching. I missed the fact that I was extremely irritable and angered easily.

My final "missed fact" was when my OB asked me at my 6-week Post Partum appointment how I was doing and I lost it - tears, panic attack and all. I hugged Alexander harder, explained that I wasn't happy with where I was, I have more "bad" days than "good", I just don't want to. I felt as though I wasn't good enough.

What scares me the most?

Still not being enough for him. Showing my weakness. Not getting better. Having more worse days than I should be.

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Post Partum Depression can be debilitating, lonely, worrisome. Contact your doctor immediately, even if you just have a feeling. There are many, many resources that are there to help you! If you are worried about your well-being or the well-being of your child, please seek help.

Post Partum Depression and Anxiety is NOT a weakness, you are no less of a woman, you are NOT a bad mother.